Show of hands... Who thought this was another vampire story from the title of the post? Sorry to disappoint, but I need to vent.
So here it is Thursday night. I have over 50 hours in on this trial already this week. And tomorrow morning, the alarm will go off at 5 and I'll leave the house around 6 and who the hell knows when I'll get home. I've barely seen my family in 2 weeks. You could say this trial is kicking my ass...
I can deal with the long hours. And with the weekend coming up, I'll catch up with my family. Andrew will remember that he has a mother and I'll spend more than 2 minutes with hubby while we're both awake and somewhat functional.
I know that most attorneys, by the time they make partner, have forgotten what it was like to be a young associate. They forget what it was like to be down in the trenches. Associates are universally overworked and under appreciated. It's part of the job. It sucks... but you deal, hoping for the bigger rewards and the larger pay off down the road.
What I can't deal with is being treated like a damn pack mule. Yes, I'm young. And I don't have a ton of experience. And I'm a woman.
But I passed the same fucking bar exam that these old, gray men did. (In fact, if you took a poll, I probably took and passed MORE exams than they did...) Just because I have tits and lack male genitalia does NOT mean that all I'm good for is carrying your bags.
I was LIVID today in court when I was told instead of conferencing the case with the magistrate that I should go back to the courtroom and pack up his bags. But that wasn't enough. After I lugged two computers, two overstuffed binders and two dep transcripts upstairs, I had to go BACK downstairs to locate a computer disc and "whatever else he might need."
It took all my self control not to scream or reach out and throttle him. I mean, I've busted my ass for this man. I learned freaking admiralty law in a week to write the trial brief. I wrote the brief (which he forgot about) in one day, sending my family off to Great Adventure without me... I learned 2 years worth of litigation in 2 weeks to second chair your trial. To do this, my family went on vacation without me.
I got him the cell phone number of a key witness for us. Without that information, there wouldn't have been a meeting over the weekend where we learned vitally important facts about the case.
I gave him an amazing line of questioning for the cross of the defendant today. He hadn't even thought to explore that area!
I had to tell him - a man who has been practicing law longer than I've been alive - what the legal standards and burden of proof are in this case... and that we have to put our side in first...
And he has me carrying his freaking bags???
I'm a team player and all... but I did NOT go to law school for this...
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14 comments:
oops! i dont know how they fell and rolled down every stair...snicker.
i am seething with anger for you, just for reading that. i can't imagine being treated like that. i'm truly sorry, jaime. oy.
It seems like seniority breeds laziness or arrogance. I can't say it's a man thing because I've seen women do the same thing.
Next time, make mule sounds under your breath.
I can't tell you how many meetings I have walked into carrying computer/av equipment, files, display boards while my associates and seniors have walked into a meeting hands empty and care free,ready to do what needs to be done while I was looking like Lucy waiting for Ethel to show up. It's up to you -you know the rules and the dues necessary--when they are met and paid, get yourself a kickass briefcase and new suit to signify the new day, find a mentor and let someone else carry the bags. It has nothing to do with gender when it comes to getting where you want to be---if you want it, take it---make a plan, work the plan and call the shots.Don't wait and don't think about it. Given everything I have read here you have what it takes and if it is any consolation, what comes around goes around and there will be a day that gent will be showing up in your office looking for a favor...trust me it will happen and you will be in control -;-)
I know there's a reason I didn't go into law!
Question. Wouild it be easier to be the pack mule if the sr. lawyer was a woman?
Personally I would expect better behavior from a sr. woman lawyer, but I've been wrong before.
I'll be mad for you too. (I however have not paid my dues and milk my feminity at every opportunity...I am part of the problem and I am sorry.)
Fuckin' old men!
That would make me mad too. I hope today goes better. Just remember the weekend is coming and you get to hug your loved ones all day and night long!
I don't know where my sense of fairness came from.. but I can't recall ever delegating anything like this to a subordinate... I guess I have always felt everyone needs to carry his/her own weight...
Shows how fukt up I am, huh??
~shoes~
hmmm sounds like he needs a good kick in the nuts.
Oh trust me I hear you. The difference between you and I is probably Salary! I cop the same shit at work, the latest indignation making an appointmnent for the CEO to have his friggin' eyebrows trimmed! He doesn't even have a bloody degree, just a public servant who's risen through the ranks. Shits me to tears. I actually agree that it doesn't have anything to do with gender but the odds are that men still hold more senior positions than women. Little wonder when you see what women have to become to reach the higher echelons of business/law whatever.
Stuff like this is exactly why I left the big law firm years ago.
Financially, not a good move.
It seemed like a good idea at the time for my sanity, but lately I'm wondering if there is any law job that is worth what you have to put up with....
Too many lawyers are arrogant and obnoxious. They're either your supervisors or your opposing counsel. I haven't found any escape yet.
And I just don't get it. There is no reason for it. One could be (I like to think I am) a perfectly fine lawyer without being a prick, but prickishness (do you like my new word?) seems to come naturally to most attorneys.
And I can hear your kids saying, "And mommy is doing this just for us"
peace for you,
please, Thank goodness you have let it out, best of luck...
This makes my blood boil, too. So sorry. What a bunch of oblivious jackasses!! Hope it gets better, Girl. And feel free to vent ANY time, that's why we're here!
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