stage fright

I was on auto-pilot. Fear gripped my insides so tightly that I could barely breathe. Somehow my feet propelled me forward, forcing my body to climb the stairs to the stage. My hands shook so violently that my speech threatened to fall from my fingers.

Public speaking never failed to cause a war between the dueling emotions of fear and excitement. Performing for an audience was both terrifying and electrifying. Mostly terrifying though.

Oddly enough, I had been assigned to give a presentation on "communication anxiety." I wanted to do nothing more than stand on the stage, with my hands shaking and clammy, beads of sweat forming on the back of my neck, my heart thudding louder than thunder and threatening to thump out of my chest, and scream, "LOOK AT ME! EXHIBIT A!"

Instead, I pulled on my glasses and threw a picture of Charlie Brown up on an easel. I proceeded to educate my audience about communication anxiety through illustrations of Charlie Brown and his apprehension of talking to a certain little red haired girl.

I had to force myself to open my mouth and let the well-rehearsed words flow. But once I got started, it became second nature. I released my death grip on the podium and began to move around the stage, losing myself in the moment. I loved the spotlight. I loved commanding the attention of the room.

Granted, I had no clue what was coming out of my mouth. I could have been completely on point or I could have been spewing utter nonsense. But I did it. I got up on that stage, faced my fear, and in the process aced the final of my speech class.

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